skyborne_mage | 26th Flight: [Voice]

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26th Flight: [Voice]

[As Luceti's populace struggles with attempts to sort out messed-up memories and personality warpings, some of the residents are combating more... mundane problems.

The journal flops open to reveal a panicked Arche fussing with something in a pan.]

Come on, don't you burn on me... Oh crap!

[She jumps over to another pan, reaching for it... and completely forgetting to grab an oven mitt as she does so.]

Yeowch! [And, of course, she drops it, the contents spilling all over the floor. She slips on them, falling out of sight of the journal, and then clambers back up to turn off the stove. She looks at the results of her endeavors.]

... Dammit, why does this always happen. Every time I try to cook... [She sighs, turning around.] Where's Mint when I need-

[She cuts off as she notices the journal open... and recording.] Oh hell, how long has this thing been on?

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I heard that! Do you have something to say?

Nothing you have not already heard, I am sure.

[Maybe laughing at you over here. Maybe.]

Oh, and I suppose you're a wizard in the kitchen, are you?

[...Dhaos has less cooking experience than Arche, actually, and he knows it.]

...I should hope I would know better than to allow something to burn.

"Should hope"?

[And after a brief pause, she's the one restraining laughter.] You've never tried to cook before, have you Dhaos?

[...He should have known that'd get out eventually. Grune tends to keep the kitchen on his floor of CH3 well-stocked enough that he never really has to actually cook anything.

It had to be Arche, though.]

...And?

And if that's the case, you don't really have any room to criticize me, do you?

[She smirks. So widely and obnoxiously.]

Your cooking skills, or that fact that you have somehow managed, while cooking, to injure yourself without the assistance of an open flame?

[Totally not feeling every ounce of that smirk over here.]

Hey, I'd like to see you grab a hot pan and not get burned!

... You're immune to that level of heat, aren't you. [It's not a question.]

Indeed I am.

[Obviously the resistance is only about half in the enclosure, but Dhaos was pretty powerful to begin with. You normal people and your normal resistances, honestly.]

And if I was not, I like to think I would take care not to touch a hot pan.

I needed to move it! My apples were burning!

You could, at least, take the precaution of--

[Pause.]

...Apples? [Dhaos does not understand what kind of food requires cooking apples on a stove.]

... I was boiling them, to soften them up for applesauce.

[... There's something resembling logic in that sentence.]

...I see.

[No he doesn't.]

...And you failed.

I left them on a little bit too long, alright... Hey, why am I justifying myself to you about this?

I am the very last person you ought to ask.

It was a rhetorical question, jerkface.

I am aware.

[He is simply desperately in need of trolling practice >>;]

Oh, so you're just trying to annoy me then.

[It's working!]

I believe I am entitled to some manner of self-indulgence by this time.

[He's getting better, then!]

[Oh now that's really obnoxious.]

On what grounds? I sure as heck don't owe you anything!

[On the grounds that Dhaos' life is now alternating between really, really boring and traumatizing, and by god if entertainment presents itself he is going to take advantage of it.]

If not you, then this cursed enclosure does. And as it was you who injured yourself performing what is apparently the simplest of cooking procedures, it is from you that I collect my due.

[Hey, that's life in Luceti for ya, Dhaos. Get used to it.]

So what you're saying is, it's nothing personal, you're just feeling sadistic today.

[At least he's trying again!]

Precisely.

[Sadistic and brazen, apparently.]

You... are...

[She grits her teeth and makes the most fascinating noise behind them, a sort of combination of gnashing and growling. Finally she just reaches out for the journal.]

We're done here, you jackass.

[And she slams the book shut.]

[Obviously Not Here]

whatdeheckisdat - 2012-04-18 22:22 (UTC) - Expand

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